Flour
by TheDirtyTruth
Summary: Four year old Jamie has an 'accident' in the kitchen. *Now a series of Reagan family oneshots!* Includes Jamie, Danny, Erin, Joe, Frank, Mary, Henry and maybe some guest appearances! Warning: Contains some mild language (blame Danny).
1. Flour

Danny bade goodbye to his friends and started to walk up to the narrow pathway up to his house. He had just got back from the cinema, and was on a bit of an action movie high. Danny twisted his house key into the old lock and pushed open the door, carelessly hanging his jacket up as he walked through the hallway. "Ma! I'm home!" he called and kicked his sneakers off. There was no answer, and Danny decided that she must have been taking a nap. Danny yawned and stretched lazily. He could sure use a snack.

"Danny! Danny! I'm in the kitchen!" Danny's four year old brother Jamie shouted from the room at the back of the house. Danny sighed. That kid was going to be the death of him. Yawning again Danny walked slowly over to the kitchen.

"Hey kid, if you're hungry then I can fix something up for the both of- WHAT THE HELL?"

Danny stopped dead in his tracks and his eyes widened at the sight. Flour covered every single surface in the kitchen and adjoining living area, splattering the walls and powdering the carpet. Amongst this mess and catastrophe Jamie was sitting near the kitchen counter, looking at Danny innocently and tracing patterns with his fingers in the white stuff.

"JAMIE! WHAT DID YOU DO?" Danny screamed rhetorically. "Oh damn, damn, damn, damn it…"

"Danny! What have I done wrong?" Jamie panicked in his squeaky voice with tears in his eyes.

"WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE YOU'VE DONE?" Danny shrieked.

"Stop shouting at me!" Jamie said and burst into tears.

"Oh no, Jamie don't cry…" Danny rushed over to Jamie and wrapped his arms around the kid's tiny waist. "Look we can clean this up…" Danny trailed off and lifted Jamie up, resting the kid on his hip, who was now sobbing into his neck.

"I'm sorry Danny!" Jamie cried even louder.

"Shh…" The older teen tried to comfort his brother. "Why were you playing with the flour?"

"I wanted to make a cake."

"You can't make stuff out of flour without cooking it."

"I know. That's why I put it in the oven." Jamie whimpered.

"You what?"

"DANNY! WHAT'S HAPPENED IN HERE?" A teenage girl shrieked in the doorway. Erin stepped into the kitchen with Joe right on her tail, whose eyes were wide with shock.

"It was Jamie… I just got back!" Danny replied with a worried tone in his voice. Jamie sobbed even louder.

"Oh Jamie…" Erin sighed and took the little one from Danny's arms.

"Where's Ma?" Joe asked and tried to brush some rogue flour off his jeans that had been on the sofa.

"Upstairs. I think she's having a nap." Danny said and wiped his brow.

"Oh God, we're gonna have to clean this up before she comes downstairs!" Erin panicked.

"Or before Pa gets back!" Joe said and put his head in his hands.

"We'd better clean Jamie up first though…" Erin sighed and Jamie sneezed. She ran up the stairs with Jamie hanging onto her and choking with tears. Erin pushed open the bathroom door and put Jamie down in the bathtub, who had now stopped crying but his eyes and face were puffy. "Come on Jamie…" Erin cooed and threw Jamie's flour covered T-shirt and jeans into the laundry basket. Scrubbing the powder off Jamie's arms and face Erin tried not to wake up their sleeping mother in the room across the landing, even though she could hear Danny and Joe cursing downstairs very loudly. Jamie was still whimpering when she washed his hair using the shower to get the clumps of the cooking ingredient out from his locks, and wrapped a towel around his shivering form. "Come on Jamie…" Erin dressed him in clean, dry clothes and led him downstairs. Danny and Joe had cleaned the kitchen up, and Erin quickly spotted a black rubbish bag full of flour and split bags that Jamie had opened. "Why are you cleaning it up?" Jamie asked.

"Because Ma doesn't like mess." Joe sighed. "You okay kid?"

"I'm sorry." Jamie sniffed.

"Hey, it was an accident."

"I didn't know it was wrong." Jamie sobbed.

"Shh, it's okay Jamie." Erin comforted him. "Now we have to finish cleaning up."

Joe got the vacuum cleaner and started vacuuming the flour from the carpet and Danny got the dustpan and brush to start sweeping it off the table and chairs. Jamie helped Erin by shaking the cushions outside, and both Danny and Joe could hear Jamie's squeaky young laughter even when they were inside their house. After sweeping the last remnants of flour under the living room rug Danny collapsed onto the sofa with Joe by his side. Erin wiped her forehead and collapsed next to him, and Jamie came running in and squeezed himself in between Danny and Joe. "Do you know how much trouble you cause?" Danny asked Jamie and laughed. Jamie giggled and Joe started tickling him, making him squirm.

"Hey… kids?" Mary looked at her four children sitting on the sofa suspiciously. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah."

"Fine."

"Yeah."

"MUM! JOE'S TICKLING ME!"

Mary laughed and sat down in an armchair opposite the sofa. "Well, you've been a good boy, haven't you Jamie?" Joe had to hold back a snigger by coughing. Danny smirked and Erin fidgeted in her seat, but Mary continued. "Yes, even when your big brothers and sister were out you were very responsible!"

"Yeah, I'm proud of my baby brother." Danny said affectionately and ruffled Jamie's hair.

"Mum, I need to tell you-" Jamie began but was cut off by Erin.

"What Jamie's trying to say is that he is very responsible, like you said."

"Yes, your father's going to be very proud." Mary sighed. And not a moment too soon Francis Reagan appeared in the living room doorway, his cheeks rosy with the cold.

"Daddy! You're home early!" Jamie cried and ran into Frank's arms.

"Hey Jamie." Frank grinned and his stomach rumbled. "I think that mans that it's time for dinner." he mused and Jamie laughed.

"Danny! Joe! Can you play with me with my legos?" Jamie pleaded with puppy dog eyes, and of course the older Reagan brothers couldn't say no. They ran upstairs, with Jamie leading the way on his short legs, and Erin heaved a heavy sigh.

"I have some homework to do." She said to her parents and followed her siblings upstairs. Erin knocked on Jamie's bedroom door and went inside, almost stepping on a piece of lego which was one of the many strewn across Jamie's bedroom floor. Danny and Joe were sitting on Jamie's bed and the kid himself was instructing them very patronisingly on how to build a helicopter pad. Erin laughed at the sight, but her joy was short lived when there was a shout from downstairs.

"WHAT'S ALL THIS IN THE OVEN?!"

"Oh damn."


	2. Handstands

_**Wow. I didn't expect that much feedback when I posted Flour! Anyway, I've decided to continue writing these oneshot thingies because they're so fun to write. Thanks for all the wonderful reviews, favourites and follows! (By the way, I'm British so some words or phrases might not be American… so I apologize for any in advance! And just the other day I found out that healthcare isn't free in America- that's crazy!) **_

* * *

"Danny!"

Daniel Reagan sighed impatiently. "What?"

"I'm bored!" Four year old Jamie shouted as he came running into Danny and Joe's room on his stubby little legs.

"How tragic." Danny muttered and continued researching 'The Effects of Antibiotics' for a science paper that was due the next day.

"Can you play with me?" Jamie pleaded. Danny groaned and rolled his eyes.

"Not now Jamie, maybe later." Danny said and turned back to his computer. It had only been three weeks since the flour 'incident', which had gotten himself, Joe and Erin grounded for two weeks for failing to 'come clean'. Unsurprisingly, Jamie had just been banned from experimenting in the kitchen, but Mary and Frank had put child-proof locks on all the kitchen cupboards just in case.

"Pwease Danny!" Jamie cried and was now clinging onto Danny's arm and shaking it violently.

"Can't you go and play with Joe, or Erin?" Danny asked, slightly irritated.

"Erin is out shopping and Joe is playing baseball in a park somewhere." Jamie replied squeakily. Danny sighed.

"Look, maybe in a minute but I really need to finish this essay." After hearing his oldest brother's reply Jamie pouted. He may have been only four years old but he knew the effect he had on his older family members when he put on the upset toddler act.

"Okay fine! Fine, fine…" Danny muttered and threw his hands up in the air and shut his computer down. Jamie smiled. "Yay!"

_Works every time._

Danny chased a very hyper Jamie downstairs, stepping on a rogue piece of Lego on the way and cursing very, very loudly. "Okay kid, what do you want to do?" Danny asked and clapped his hands together.

"Lego?"

"We always play with Lego. Maybe something else?"

"Tag!"

"Maybe something less energetic," Danny sighed. "…and dangerous."

"Colouring?" Jamie asked a little half-heartedly.

"Sure thing."

Jamie ran over to a cupboard in the living room (Danny had to open it because of the locks) and brought out a colouring pencil with a monkey motif and some of Erin's prized colouring pencils. Danny laughed at Jamie's equipment choice and scooped him up and carried him over to the living room table, making aeroplane noises and tickling Jamie. The younger Reagan laughed and opened his Christmas present colouring book and started choosing colours appropriate for a hippopotamus.

"No Jamie, a penguin's eyes are not yellow… no you need to colour _inside _the lines. Are you sure that grass is purple? Look, I'm only trying to help!"

Danny's phone rang and he quickly answered it, grinning at the caller ID. "Hey babe. Yeah. Yeah. No, I haven't finished it. I'll do it later! Okay. Okay. But I'm stuck with you-know-who. That isn't funny. As if I would be helping Lord Voldemort colour in monkeys holding tea parties. Yeah I know."

As Danny was having his interesting conversation Jamie had gotten bored of colouring and was watching the TV Erin had left on from earlier that day. He sat himself down on the now flour-free sofa and began watching a gymnastics tournament that was being televised someplace in China. Jamie started watching just in time as the skilled Eastern-European gymnast flew off the uneven bars using a handstand and a backflip, landing perfectly on the mats and drinking in the applause that had erupted from the spectators. Of course, like most young children, Jamie was, well, let's just say rather impressionable.

"Yeah. Love you too. See you tomorrow." Danny said goodbye to his girlfriend Linda and hung up. "Oh, you're over there." Danny turned around to face Jamie.

"I want to show you something!" Jamie squeaked.

"Okay then."

Jamie grabbed Danny's large hand with his own small one and ran to the back door, obviously extremely excited. The older of the two unlocked the door and they ran outside into the backyard and Jamie led Danny to a wall at the far end of the lawn. "What is it that you want to show me?"

"Look." Jamie said simply. He threw his hands up in the air, jumped and bent over, landing on his hands. But Danny didn't even have enough time to react when Jamie toppled over onto his side, landing with a sickening crack on a pile of disused bricks next to the wall.

"JESUS CHRIST JAMIE!" Danny shouted and ran over to his brother. "DON'T EVER DO THAT AGAIN!" Danny attempted to lift Jamie up but froze when Jamie winced. "Is everything okay?"

"My arm hurts." Jamie moaned.

"I'm sure it's fine." Danny sighed, but it was only then when he noticed some crimson blood trickle down Jamie's forehead. He then looked at Jamie's arm, which was bent at a wrong angle. "Oh. My. God."

"DANNY IT HURTS!" Jamie shouted and the waterworks went into full swing.

"Um, uh, we, uh… let's get you to a hospital." Danny decided and lifted Jamie up again, being careful not to touch the little one's arm. "Oh God, Ma's gonna kill me. Then bury me and dig me up again and kill me again just to prove a point…" Danny panicked. He grabbed his keys, phone and wallet on the way out and a jacket to keep Jamie warm. Frustratingly he was still not old enough to get his driver's license. "Damn the Senate…" Danny muttered. "Uh…" Danny panicked for a second. He couldn't drive, and couldn't really carry Jamie to the nearest hospital. Danny set Jamie down on the pavement and dialled 911, hoping that an ambulance would get him and Jamie to a hospital.

_Twenty Minutes Later_

Danny sat in the uncomfortable hospital chair as Jamie had an X-Ray in the next room. The soda from the vending machine had been flat (as usual) and Danny couldn't stop blaming himself for what happened. The doctor in a pristine white coat opened the door and Danny stood up. "He's broken his arm. We're going to set it in plaster now. Are your parents aware of this?" The doctor spoke plainly.

"Uh, no." That's one thing he forgot to do.

"I suggest you inform them." The doctor droned on and went back into the X-Ray room, but quickly came back out again with Jamie and a kind looking nurse. Danny followed them to a small room just a few metres away from where he had just been sitting and the doctor sat Jamie down, preparing his broken arm for a cast. Danny held onto his tiny hand tightly, wishing that he had somehow stopped Jamie from toppling over into that pile of bricks. Why was there a pile of bricks anyway? Danny and the nurse jumped when Danny's phone rang for the second time that day and the teenager grimaced, but answered it anyway as he didn't want to get any more heat from the caller.

"**Danny? Where are you?" **Mary asked with a shrill voice.

"Well, cute story, you see…"

"**Don't BS me!" **Danny's mouth fell open in surprise. His mother never, _ever_ used language like that.

"Long story short, Jamie broke his arm."

"**HE WHAT?"**

"He was trying to do a handstand and he kinda fell over…"

"**OH MY GOD! ARE YOU WITH HIM? OH MY GOD… OH MY GOD!"**

"Yes, he's right here." Danny handed the phone to Jamie.

"Hey mummy!" Jamie squeaked. "Yes I'm OK, Danny called an am-boo-lance. I'm OK, really. See you later!" Jamie reluctantly handed the phone back to Danny.

"**You really should have been watching him!"**

"I was! I just didn't expect it… and why is there a pile of bricks at the end of the backyard?"

"**I don't know. Is that what he broke his arm on? Anyway, we'll be down as soon as we can." **

"See ya." Danny was relieved to hang up. Boy, was he gonna get it. "Are you okay Jamie?"

"Yeah." Jamie replied. The doctor had finished wrapping Jamie's arm in bandages and had placed Jamie's arm in a soft cast, and was now draping wet plaster over it (blue by the way, Jamie's favourite colour).

"It only takes a few minutes to dry." The nurse told him. Danny gripped Jamie's hand even tighter. The nurse had cleaned up Jamie's forehead and a few more cuts on his other arm and gave him a large, colourful and swirly lollipop, which Jamie accepted gratefully. After the ten minutes were up Jamie touched and prodded his new cast, almost testing the fit. "I'll sign it when we go home." Danny told Jamie. Jamie looked horrified.

"Why do you want to sign it? I want to keep it nice and _clean_." Jamie said with a bit of an attitude.

"Suit yourself." Danny shrugged. The door burst open and Mary, Frank and Henry, Danny and Jamie's grandfather, entered the room.

"Oh my poor baby, does it hurt?" Mary asked.

"No." Jamie said and laughed for some reason.

"You're a brave young man." Henry told him and Jamie puffed out his chest, making everyone in the room laugh.

"Now you," Mary pointed at Danny, "Are in big, big trouble…"

"He couldn't have helped in that situation." Frank told Mary and nodded at Danny.

"I suppose."

"Right now we need to focus on paying the bill and getting this young man home." said Henry. Jamie thanked the doctor and the nurse as Frank paid the hospital bill and the five drove home.

"You're really brave Jamie. You'll make a great cop someday!" Henry exclaimed.

"But I don't wanna be a cop." Jamie pouted. Everyone in the car gasped.

"What do you want be then?" Mary asked.

"A gymnast!"


	3. Swimming

_**Whoa, sorry for not updating for a while! Who knew 13 year olds could get so much homework? Enjoy!**_

* * *

"We don't have all day, kid."

Danny sighed impatiently and tapped his foot on the edge of the sidewalk. The teenager checked his watch and sighed again after seeing the time. He was meant to take Linda out tonight, and if his kid brother was gonna take any longer he would be unfashionably late. "Come on Jamie!" Frank shouted from the driver's seat. The cop tapped the steering wheel just as his son Danny was tapping his foot, and Joe too was tapping away at his Gameboy in the backseat.

Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap.

Erin was next to Frank in the passenger's seat with ear buds in her ears, oblivious to the rest of the world, her feet also tapping in time with the rhythm.

Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap.

"KID!" Danny shouted at his wits end. And not a moment too soon the youngest Reagan opened the door and ran as fast as his little legs could carry him down the narrow pathway, Spiderman towel in hand. "'Bout time!" Danny opened the car door and Jamie jumped inside and squeezed himself next to Joe, who jumped at the sudden human interaction (an anomaly for teenagers). Danny shuffled inside and did Jamie's seatbelt and his too. The four year old was almost hyperventilating with excitement as Frank reversed out of the drive while he waved enthusiastically at Mary who was standing inside the living room at the window. "Hey! HEY!" Danny kicked the back of Erin's seat.

"WHAT?" Erin pulled a bud out of her ear and whipped around to face her older brother.

"Can you turn that down a little? It's so nauseating I think I'm gonna throw up."

"Shut up." Erin resumed listening to her awful pop songs, turning the volume up even more just to annoy Danny, who sighed again.

"Is it too late to go back to the house?"

"Yes, yes it is Danny."

"Hey Joe! JOE! JOOOOEEE!"

"WHAT?"

"CAN YOU TURN THAT DOWN TOO?"

"No."

"Screw you!"

"Watch your language Danny!"

Danny slumped back into his seat. Jamie was shaking with excitement and started chattering away about all the things he was going to accomplish once they got to their 'destination'.

"First I'm going to go on the BIIIIIIIG diving board and jump off…"

"Jamie,"

"Yes?"

"You are **not **going on the big diving board."

"But daaaaaad-"

"You're too young." Frank told his son and turned around a corner. Jamie stuck out his bottom lip and crossed his arms. Danny started laughing.

"_I'm _going on the big diving board." Danny gloated.

"You're not either." Frank grumbled and stopped at some lights.

"What? Why not?"

"You know what happened last time." Frank muttered. Danny started mumbling about how his life was so unfair and how he didn't deserve siblings and wishing he was-

"Danny!"

"Yes?"

"Can you play I-spy with me?"

"No Jamie… I'm, uh, too tired."

"I SPY WITH MY LITTLE EYE, SOMETHING BEGINNING WITH S…"

Danny groaned. This was going to be a very, very long day.

* * *

"Danny!"

"WHAT?"

"Where're my goggles?"

"I dunno!"

"Where're my armbands?"

"I don't know Jamie!" Danny shoved the duffel bag into a locker and pinned the key to his trunks. Jamie clung onto Danny's arm and started shaking it violently, which was extremely annoying. "Look, here they are." Danny handed the frighteningly bright neon orange armbands to Jamie who slid them on.

"Can you blow them up?"

Danny groaned.

Again.

* * *

Jamie padded over to the edge of the pool to where Erin and Frank were. Frank tested the water with his toe before sliding into the water. "Come on then!" he gestured for Jamie and Erin to join him.

"No thanks, I don't want to get my hair wet." Erin sat on the edge of the pool and dangled her legs in the water. Frank rolled his eyes.

"Okay then!" Jamie grinned a toothy smile.

"Not like that Jamie… no, NO!"

Jamie took a large run up, launched himself off the side and jumped into the pool, completely drenching Erin and those around him as water flew up around him after he had broken the surface. Jamie resurfaced (thanks to his armbands) and looked up at his older sister, who was mortified and dripping wet. "JAY -MIE!" Erin screamed. Danny, who had apparently watched the whole escapade, came striding up to his family laughing. "IT'S NOT FUNNY DANNY!" Erin shouted.

"Yes actually, it is," Danny grinned. "Isn't it Jamie?" Jamie nodded. Danny laughed again and dove into the pool and swam up to Jamie who screamed as Danny grabbed onto his short legs and started pulling him backwards. Jamie began laughing and screaming at the same time, which was quite a feat considering he was swallowing mouthfuls of water at a time.

"Okay Danny, let Jamie breathe…" Frank sighed and took Jamie from Danny. Jamie frantically started/tried to swim away from Danny and over to Erin who had now actually gotten into the pool.

"Quick Erin! Danny's a shark!" Jamie cried and grasped Erin's hand. Deciding that she couldn't stay mad at her little brother for much longer Erin laughed and started swimming away from Danny, who had begun to give chase. But of course, Erin wasn't the strongest of swimmers and Jamie couldn't swim at all, so their older brother quickly caught up with them. Danny cackled evilly as Erin and Jamie screamed, but were both interrupted when Frank came up behind them and dragged Erin beneath the surface. Jamie's eyes went wide for a split second before he too was pulled underwater by Danny. Jamie opened his eyes and was greeted by the sting of chlorine, but he could just about see Danny hovering in front of him. Jamie thought that his older brother looked like a chipmunk underwater with his blown up cheeks and laughed. However, when he laughed the air rushed out of his lungs and he quickly started choking. Danny went into full big-brother mode and lifted Jamie up above the water where Frank and Erin had resurfaced, both splashing each other. Danny also resurfaced with Jamie and flicked his wet hair out of his eyes. "Is Jamie okay?" Frank asked worriedly and took Jamie from Danny.

"I'm fine Daddy," Jamie spluttered. "I laughed because Danny looks like a chipmunk underwater."

"Really?" Erin laughed along with her dad.

"Shut up." Danny mumbled but started laughing anyway. "Come on Dad, can I please go on the taller diving board?"

"OK, but be careful, I don't want what happened last time to happen this time."

"It won't." Danny reassured Frank and quickly got out of the pool. Frank sighed and told Erin to watch over Jamie as he needed to go to the bathroom. Erin obliged, but wasn't really listening as she was 'discreetly' eyeing a boy from her class at school who was flicking his hair in an I-know-you're-looking-at-me fashion. Sensing his sister's distraction Jamie swam over to the ladder at the side of the swimming pool and got out of the water, being careful not to alert Erin to his absence. He trotted over to the steps of the biggest diving board and started climbing up to Danny, jumping large parts of the queue by saying he had to speak to his older brother. "Hello Danny!" Jamie squeaked after he got to the front of the queue just behind Danny.

"Jamie? What are you doing here?" Danny asked as he turned around.

"I want to have a go on the big diving board!"

"Whoa kid, you ain't comin' on here. It's too dangerous."

"But Danny-"

"I said no." Danny made his point clear and walked up to the edge of the board.

"But Danny!" Jamie ran across the board and right up to his brother.

"WHOA! JAMIE YOU HAVE TO GET OFF!" Danny shouted when the board started shaking.

"But Danny!" Jamie repeated and started jumping up and down in frustration.

"NO! STOP THAT!"

"DANNY!" Jamie whined and continued jumping.

"JAMIE STOP, WE'RE GONNA-"

But it was too late.

Jamie slipped and at the last moment grabbed onto Danny's hand, pulling both of them off the edge of the board. They both screamed, bearing in mind that they were a good 40ft above the pool, and they both fell towards the water. Jamie was subconsciously smart and let go of Danny's hand, keeping his arms pinned to his sides and his legs straight and below him.

Oh, but Danny.

Poor, poor Danny.

Danny just kept in the same position as he fell.

_**Smack.**_

The two brothers entered the water at the same time, but it was only Danny who supplied the sound effect.

Ouch.

* * *

"IT'S NOT FUNNY ERIN!" Danny shouted.

"Yes actually, it is," Erin grinned. "Isn't it Jamie?" Jamie nodded. Danny winced and pressed the icepack against his red stomach harder. Frank sighed.

"I told you not to go on the big diving board…"


	4. This Cola Tastes Funny

_**Sorry for not updating my stories for a while, I've been really busy with school. Anyway, hope you enjoy!**_

* * *

"DAAAANNNNNNYYYY!"

No answer.

"DAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNYYYYYY!"

"WHHAAAAAAATTT?"

"I DON'T WANNA GO!" Jamie screamed. Danny looked at his younger sister Erin pleadingly but went into his little brother's room nonetheless.

"Come on kid, we're leaving soon!"

"BUT I DON'T WANNA GO!" Jamie shrieked. The little one was actually hiding under his bed, and had strategically positioned pillows, toys, chairs and various bedroom objects around himself so that nobody could reach him.

"Jamie come on, it'll be over before you know it."

"NO!" Jamie shouted. Danny almost exploded with frustration. The elder Reagan violently pushed a computer chair out of the way, knocking over a box of Lego with it, and grabbed onto Jamie's ankles. "NO!" Jamie shrieked again.

"YOU-ARE-COMING-WHETHER-YOU-LIKE-IT-OR-NOT!" Danny shouted and yanked Jamie out from under the bed.

"NOOOOO!" Jamie screamed again and clung onto one of the bed legs.

"JAMIE! WORK WITH ME HERE!"

"NOOOOOOO!"

Danny finally pulled Jamie from the bed legs and swung him over his shoulder in a fireman lift. "PUT ME DOWN DANNY!" Jamie screamed and started punching his older brother's back.

"JAMIE! DANNY!" Mary screamed.

"YEEEEEES?" Danny shouted back.

"ARE YOU TWO READY?"

"UH…"

"DANNY?"

"WELL, I AM, BUT JAMIE ISN'T…" Danny paused. "HE'S REFUSING TO GET DRESSED."

"HE'S NAKED?"

"NO… HE'S STILL IN HIS WOLVERINE PYJAMAS!"

"BUT IT'S SIX O'CLOCK IN THE EVENING!"

"I KNOW!"

"DAAANNNNYYY! PUUUTTT MEEEE DOOOOOOWWWWNN!"

"What are you doing to the poor kid?" Henry Reagan asked in the doorway of Jamie's bedroom, fiddling with his tie.

"He's refusing to get dressed!" Danny said and put down his younger brother.

"Come on Jamie, it'll be fun." Henry tried to convince his youngest grandson.

"No it won't!" Jamie replied.

"Look on the bright side Jamie, it won't last forever!"

"But it will be sooooo boring!"

"Okay, so I agree with you there," Danny handed a shirt to Jamie. "But it's for Dad. Do you want to ruin his very formal birthday dinner for him?"

"No." Jamie said quietly.

"Then can you please get dressed?"

Jamie reluctantly peeled off his Wolverine pyjama top and replaced it with a crisp, crystal white shirt and changed into some black trousers. "I want my Wolverine pyjamas." he whimpered.

"You can't go out in your pyjamas, Jamie."

"Why not?"

"Because… you sleep in your pyjamas, you don't go out in them." Danny mentally congratulated himself on thinking of an excuse. Jamie sighed and looked longingly at his favourite items of clothing that were crumpled on his bedroom floor. "We leave in ten!" Erin shouted from the landing and ran into Jamie's room. "Let's fix your hair Jamie." Erin cooed and held up a comb menacingly.

"NO!" Jamie panicked and hid behind his brother, who started laughing. Erin sighed exasperatingly and looked pleadingly at Danny. Danny too sighed and grabbed Jamie round the shoulders and squeezed them tightly, preventing the younger one from running away. "NOOO DANNY!" Jamie shrieked as Erin began attacking his hair with the comb.

"See Jamie, it wasn't that bad!" Erin exclaimed once she had finished her attack. Jamie gave her a death glare and pouted (that was going to be a grudge for the next few weeks).

"Why are you all dressed up?" Joe asked sleepily in the doorway, still in his pyjamas.

"Joe! Its dad's birthday dinner!"

"Wait- what?"

"RUN JOE RUN!" Danny screamed as Mary came plodding up the stairs. Sensing certain death Joe bolted back to his room, slamming and locking the door behind him and desperately pulling clothes out of drawers. Mary knocked on the door.

"Joe?"

"YES?" Joe shouted.

"Are you okay in there? I hope you're ready!"

"Uh… yeah, I'm ready!"

"Can I come in then?"

"NO!"

"What?"

"Uh… teenage boy problems." Joe stuttered.

"Oh… right." Mary backed away from the door slowly then quickly went back downstairs again. Immediately Joe ran back into Jamie's room, his shirt open and un-tucked and his black trousers around his ankles.

"Oh crap!" Joe exclaimed as he tripped over his feet and faceplanted into the carpet. Jamie, Danny and Erin all burst out laughing as their sibling picked himself off the floor and buttoned his shirt, his face red with embarrassment. Joe quickly finished dressing and splashed on some of Danny's cologne (too much, may I add), then the four Reagan siblings made it downstairs (after both Danny and Joe stepped on some Lego) with one minute to spare, as Mary kept reminding them, and piled into the two cars outside.

* * *

Jamie fidgeted in his seat. There were more than twenty people around the massive table at the fancy restaurant. There was him, Danny, Erin, Joe, Mary, Frank, Henry, Betty and lots of city officials that he either didn't know or couldn't recall their names.

Jamie hated strangers.

Fortunately, the Reagan children were all seated around a corner of the table, and nobody was sitting next to Danny or Erin so they were quite isolated from the rest of the party. But Jamie still pushed his food around his plate in boredom. Danny was making a tent out of napkins while Joe was tapping a beat on the table with his cutlery. Erin was trying to look grown up and had moved further along the table, engrossed in a conversation between two city officials. Jamie fidgeted in his seat for a further ten minutes; before Erin became so annoyed with him that she stopped listening to a riveting conversation about the DA's new budget policy. "Here," she sighed and pushed a fancy glass of cola towards him. Jamie took a sip of the sugary drink, then winced and put it down.

"It tastes funny." he complained.

"It's probably diet cola," Danny dismissed and challenged Joe to a game of hangman. Jamie shrugged and continued drinking the funny-tasting cola.

* * *

"Daaannnnyy, I don't feel very well." Jamie complained later on in the evening.

"What? Was it something you ate?" Danny replied.

"I don't knooooow."

"Or was it something you…"

Jamie hiccupped.

"…drank."

"I nneeed thee toileeet." Jamie slurred.

"What's wrong with Jamie?" Erin asked. Jamie started laughing hysterically and fell off his chair, Joe looking at him like he was crazy. "Is Jamie _drunk_?"

"Damn kid." Danny breathed and clapped his younger brother on the back.

"Danny! It's not funny!" Erin shouted in a panicked manner.

"Is everything okay over there?" Mary asked. Jamie burst into laughter again and slid off his chair, bringing a plate of spaghetti Bolognese down onto Joe's lap. Joe yelped and stood up quickly, knocking the table and spilling some apple juice in between Danny's legs, who in turn flipped a plate of carbonara into the air and down Erin's dress. The three shocked Reagans stood there, mouths hanging open while everyone at the table looked at them, stunned. Suddenly, a young boy's squeaky laughter broke the silence and Jamie stood up, clutching his side.

"JAAAMMMIEE!"

"JOOOOOOOEE!"

"DAAAANNNYY!"

"EEERRRIIIINNN!"

Jamie stopped laughing. All of his siblings were looking either at him or at each other, infuriated.

"I don't feeeelll sssoo gooood…" Jamie moaned.

"Shut up Jamie, now I look as though I've peed myself…"

"But…"

One word was all Jamie could manage before promptly vomiting on the table.

Some of the diners, including Erin, screamed and jumped back, while the rest continued staring. Erin looked down at her dress, which was still covered in pasta, and ushered Jamie to the bathroom. Joe followed her first, shuffling awkwardly while trying to disguise his uncomfort, with Danny right behind him, who was covering the suspicious yellow stain between his legs with a dinner plate. Frank and Mary looked at each other with raised eyebrows and sighed.

"If Jamie's this bad tonight then I dread to think how he'll be tomorrow."


End file.
